Victorian Love Greeting Card: Pierrot Clown with Red Hearts

Picture this: somebody's child has been swallowed whole by a white satin Pierrot costume covered in gold and red hearts, topped with a spiraling cone hat that could double as a medieval siege weapon — and whoever designed this thought 'yes, THIS is how we say I love you.' The kid is actually smiling and holding out a large red bow like a peace offering, rosy-cheeked and curly-haired, which somehow makes it worse, because nothing about a child dressed as a romantic jester clutching a ribbon while the words 'To My Love' hover overhead in ornate gold script should read as charming. The oversized ruffled collar frames the face like a satellite dish tuned to the frequency of Victorian emotional damage, and the little red heart-toed shoes complete an outfit that screams 'my love for you is legally a costume.'