Victorian Valentine's Day Greeting Card with Woman in Hat

Like a hyperrealistic Instagram thirst trap mounted under glass, a woman in a truly unhinged wide-brimmed hat festooned with feathers gazes out from a green embossed background, her yellow dress just barely visible below the shoulders — because if you wanted to convey 'I cherish you,' obviously presenting your beloved as decorative wall art is the move. The delicate white floral wreath surrounding the heart adds a funerary-chic touch, while the two red carnations lounging at the bottom scream 'I panic-bought these at the last minute.' 'Valentine Greeting' curls across the bottom in festive red lettering, completing the vibe of a card that says less 'you have my heart' and more 'I have mounted your portrait in my drawing room and I am not taking questions.'