Victorian Merry Christmas Card with Gold Bell & Holly

That enormous golden bell dangling suggestively from a ribbon has the confidence of someone who knows they're the main character, and Ellen H. Clapsaddle — yes, a real human signed this thing — apparently decided that what Christmas needed was exactly that. Ornately engraved and absolutely massive relative to everything else on the card, it hangs there while a jaunty cursive banner reading 'A Merry Christmas' floats above as if trying desperately to make this about Jesus and not about The Bell. Meanwhile, the mistletoe and holly berries — plump, glistening, aggressively red — cluster around that ribbon with an energy that can only be described as 'nature having opinions.' Wholesome? Sure. If you say so.